25 Year Medal

I just got the most amazing thing in the mail: A reward/medal for being a type 1 diabetic for 25 years.  I have been type 1 for 28 years...but I finally got my "25 year medal."  There are two medals you can get: 1 from Joslin Diabetes Hospital in Boston, and the other one is from Eli Lilly (the insulin company).  I obtained the Lilly Award.  I am working so hard  to get my Joslin award!  I have written my letter to CHEO (the hospital I was diagnosed at back in 1985), now I'm just waiting to get my "proof" so I can mail it to Joslin!  So exciting!

So Proud of it!!!

Oh Paisley

I have always been told if you have nothing nice to say, to say nothing at all.  That is all I'm going to write about my "Diabetic Alert Dog."  I have nothing nice or good to say about her or the company (mostly the company though) so I'm not going to write anything.  She is a nice house pet for our family...

My First JDRF Walk

This past Saturday was pretty exciting for me.  I was invited to join a friend (who has a 1st grade daughter with type 1) to join their team for the JDRF Walk.  I have NEVER, in my 28 years as a diabetic, done the walk.  Never.  I agreed after she asked me a couple times to do it.  I also registered my husband and both kids ;)  I posted the link to the walk site on my facebook page and suddenly I had donations coming and lots of friends/family asking to walk too!  Our team went from about 15 people to 44 in one week!  We made t-shirts for the team, and walked proudly.  A friend of mine in Dallas helps set up the walk so it was amazing to see her and all of her hard work there.  I also belong to a large group of type 1 women online and met 3 of them there!  2 of them were on the team, and another one had a team of her own.  What a great walk!  I am already looking forward to doing it again next year!

Arrival Date

I found out yesterday morning that Paisley will come home on August 16th.  That is the same day we close on our house that we are selling.  Oh my!  So busy.  Good thing we like crazy and hectic schedules because boy, is August nuts!  I'll post more about that soon!

5 Needles A Day

How could I forget to write about my newest needle???  Oh my, sorry ya'll but I am so far behind. Keeping up with these blogs is hard work when you've got 2 busy kids running around!  At my endo appt in April my endocrinologist and I were talking about how great my numbers were...except for my morning blood sugar reading. It was always in the low 200's but thats high for me.  I suggested (since I'm the smart one here) taking some NPH at bedtime.  I am on 3 types of insulin: humalog (fast acting.  It starts to work to lower my blood sugar within 15 minutes of injecting it), NPH (this is the "old" long acting insulin.  It works for 6-8 hours, but doesn't start to work until the humalog is starting to stop working), and Lantus (24 hour insulin.  Its what I call my "pump" insulin.  I'm not on the pump, but for people who do have an insulin pump, it gives then a teeny tiny dose of insulin all day and night to keep their sugars lowered.  My Lantus works for 24 hours to keep my sugars in check).

I used to take 2 needles per day growing up.  One at breakfast and one at dinner.  Both needles included 2 types of insulin (NPH and R.  R is the older version of today's humalog.  It just didn't start to work as quickly as humalog does).  I was on these two needles from the time I was diagnosed at 21 months of age until I turned 13.  It worked well for me and I had great numbers.  When I turned 13 I needed a little more help.  So I was switched to humalog instead of R insulin and put on a third needle: lantus, at bedtime.  My numbers got back to pretty good.  When I was pregnant with my second son I needed a little more help around lunchtime (since I wasn't taking any insulin then).  I was put on a 4th needle.  I thought it might just be during the pregnancy, but my numbers were so good I didn't really want to get rid of the needle.  Then the 5th needle...a couple months ago.

People go "wow, 5 needles?"  Um, yes.  And you know what?  There are times I take more than 5 if my sugars are high.  BUT, I wouldn't go back to the pump for all the money in the world.  I like not being attached to a machine.  I felt "sick" and everyone knew I had diabetes when they saw it on me.  The needles of the pump hurt like hell.  I hated it.  I gave up on diabetes, and it took me YEARS to regain control.  YEARS.  Now that I finally have control, and great control at that, I won't go back to the pump and risk losing control again. The pump is an AMAZING little machine that is a life savor for many many people.  Its just not for me...  :(

So yes, 5 needles.  And I asked for the 5th needle...so glad I did.  I wake up with perfect numbers every single morning now!  (between 75 and 115)

The Call

I am terrible about keeping up with this blog.  I might have to change that...soon.  Two weeks ago I called Dan from the company I am getting my D.A.D through.  I needed to ask him a question about corporate matching on donations. He was busy so I left him a message.  I had to run to the bank, and by the time I got home he had already called me back.  His message on the answering machine said something to the effect of: "Hi Krista, Dan here.  I was wanting to call you today but you beat me to it...."  HUH?  Why did he need to call me?

I had been on facebook a few times that day and had seen others posting about "We got our call from Dan, our puppy is ready!!!"  I thought "there is NO way mine is ready.  Its 2 months earlier than expected."

Well, when we finally got ahold of each other later on that night he told me the news: My puppy HAD been chosen and its a black female.  Her parents are Tonic and Hannah.

I was upset for a bit because we truly had our hearts set on a chocolate male.  We had NO names for a girl chosen at all.  It was going to be another full week before pictures of her would be posted.  :(

A few days later Nick and I went to bed.  Nick couldn't sleep so he got out of bed and went online.  He saw on my facebook wall a couple of people's dog albums being posted.  He stayed awake until 2 am to see our girl!

Let me just say, the second I saw her picture there was no going back.  I loved her so much.  It truly was love at first sight.

Dan told me on the phone she was chosen for our family because she is so active and can keep up with us.  We truly are a very active and busy family so thats good...even though another spazz isn't what I had in mind.  Oh well!  You can tell in her eyes that she has some spunk to her, hehehe!

Okay, enough about the wait...want to see her???  Here's my girl: Paisley!

We had a really hard time coming up with her name.  I really wanted a name that was somehow medical or diabetes related.  When we said Paisley though it fit.  So, Paisley she is.

We were told she was coming in one month: July.  I couldn't wait.  Then I froze in my tracks.  What about our 2 vacations we have set up back to back the first 2 weeks of August?  We booked them expecting her to come late August through October.  I got really worried and started to stress out.  I called Dan back a week later and he agreed with me that putting her drop off until after our trips would be best.  Its so hard because I want her here so badly!  I just know how stressful it would all be with a service dog so young doing big trips like that.  So, now we are looking at the middle of August.  She will be so big by then!  

Online Auction for my D.A.D

I am a terrible blogger lately!  I'm not going to list any excuses for not writing though!  I've been working really hard gathering items for my online auction to raise money for my D.A.D.  I've gotten some really great things.  I plan on starting the auction next weekend (May 19th-20th) on my facebook account.  There's only one Krista Middleton I believe.  Add me to facebook and check out the items I have.  Also, all items are starting off at $5.  Yup, even the pack of 4 gold tournament tickets and the Dooney and Bourke purse!!!

A Bit of Stress

It has been about 2 months now since we registered for my D.A.D.  I have put a little over $2,000 dollars down towards my dog.  I spend hours every single day wondering how I am going to come up with the $20,000 (approximately) the my pup is going to cost.  I know I can do it though.  I always do good under stress, I just haven't had a price tag added to other stressful situations before!  I have so many other D.A.D. owners telling me not to pay any money towards my dog, that all money should come from donations but I'm not comfortable with that.  This is my  dog and I want to be a big part of it!  I have bought silicone bracelets with the D.A.D logo on them that I am selling for $5 a piece, and we are going to make up some t-shirts.  I have so much to do and I sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed.  I am slowly getting things rolling, and it feels good.

Also, my endo.  Back in Oct/Nov time I  tried to set up an appointment to see my endocrinologist.  I got a message that I owed money.  I said yes, I just got a bill for twenty dollars and I want to pay it off right now.  The lady on the other end said "no, you owe around $400."  Long story short, the stupid doctors office messed up again.  Their billing people are morons.  18 months AFTER my appointment they try and bill the insurance company and expect the insurance company to pay.  I no longer even had that insurance.  Of course they won't pay!  Then they try and stick me with the bill.  This is the SECOND time that the office has come after me for their billings mistakes.  Both times was 18 months after the doctors appointment too.  How ridiculous.  I put up a fight both times.  This time I dealt with a lady named "K."  She tried to help me over a couple weeks time before informing me that she was quitting to go elsewhere.  Great, had to start over.  I then call the new lady in January named "O."  O informs me that when she says she will take care of something, she does it.  I found out today O has also left the office.  Nice.  Finally today (end of March) I find out from the endo's nurse that they wiped my debt off.  Excuse me?  It was under my name but it was your office's fault.  UGH, talk about stress I don't need.  It makes me so mad that I couldn't see my doctor for my health because of their stupidity.   Its a good thing I like the doctor...and that I threatened to call the better business bureau.  :)

Down Payment Has Been Paid!

Well consider this my first post of many exciting one's to come!  I finally did it.  Nick and I met a lady online who has a diabetic alert dog (DAD) for her sons; both of which have type 1 diabetes.  I was amazed that one dog could work with two people.  So I sent her a little message asking how that worked.  2 months later I have put a deposit down on my own DAD.  I never thought I would do it.  I'm not a huge dog lover, and I've already got 2 wiener dogs at home.  Unfortunately after having my second son I was having so many lows that couldn't be explained.  It got to the point that Nick (my husband) wouldn't go to work in the office anymore (he only works from home now on his laptop).

Last night for example I checked my blood sugar: 72.  We went out for dinner and then I came home and had my insulin.  45 minutes later I was reading a story to Cooper (my 4 year old) and the words were blurry.  I couldn't make sense of the words.  I checked my blood-sugar and I was 33.  I drank a huge glass of milk (my go to when I'm low) and checked 10 minutes later: 30!  I was DROPPING.  Another huge glass of milk (I probably weigh 20 pounds more now too!) and then I recheck.  36.  What the heck???  I ate out and took my regular insulin.  I SHOULD be on the higher side of a perfect number!  I check a few minutes after and now I'm 46.  I hover around this number for 45 minutes before getting back to my safe zone of low 70ish area.

So that was the point we said "enough is enough."  I work so hard to have perfect numbers.  I am doing everything I can.  I looked into the CGM's (continuous glucose monitors) but quickly decided that was NOT for me.  I started researching DAD's and always ended back at the Warren Retrievers.  I LOVE that they create a plan that works around your family.  Here, I'll just make a list of what I love about them:
1. They work around YOUR wants and needs.
2. You get the D.A.D as a young puppy so it is trained on your/my scent, not someone else's
3. They are supported by JDRF
4. My money is partially turned into donations towards JDRF that will find my cure.  So really, I am getting a dog for free that can save my life while supporting funding for my cure.  :)
5.  They work with any family (more than one type 1 in the house, if you have tiny kids, if you have other dogs...)
6.  I don't have to pay for the dog up front.  I pay my down payment to get on the waiting list, then do fundraisers to achieve my personalized goal that we set up for my cost.  Its all about me and my family!
7. They help find ways to do fundraisers, its like a separate family.
8.  Once I paid my down payment, Dan, the head hauncho ( insert smiley face here) said "welcome to the family."  Really?  My heart pounded because this darn disease often makes us feel so alone, and for once it made me really thankful to have it.  Not to be diabetic, but to have something that can bring me closet to others for such an important reason.  Does that make sense?

There is so much more that I  will soon get to!  Keep checking back!

Go, Go, Go...STOP.

We have been needing to sell our house for about 2 years now.  We tried when I was pregnant with my son Wyatt, but it didn't sell.  Wyatt is now a year and a half old and we have totally outgrown this house.  Its a GREAT little house, but its little.  We have no play area's, no game room, no "extra" anything.  There is no hallway closet/s for storage either.  We store our blankets in the corner by the couch.  I'm love doing arts and crafts with the kids, but unfortunately there is no room to do big fun things because I have nowhere to store the stuff.  In our small little coat closet I have shoved all our art supplies on the top shelf.  That would be fine, but where do I put the things such as umbrellas and hats/mittens/scarves that need to be in the coat closet.  You get my point...back to the diabetes blog, Krista.

So today I started do the massive cleaning and boxing up of things we don't need on a daily basis.  We CANNOT put our house on the market the way it is now.  In Wyatt's closet we have an old sub-woofer of Nicks, a guitar of Nicks (PS, he doesn't play guitar...at all), extra diapers that kids grew out of that size before we ever got to use them....clothes boxes....and its not a very big closet!  So Wyatt's room got my attention today.  I went CRAZY.  The cleaning bug got me good.  Lysol wipes even got some major use in there...then...the xmas stuff started to get put away.  Boy, I am on a roll...  I also got 1 load of laundry washed, dried and put away...one more in the dryer and one in the  wash.... THEN...I feel weak.  Again.  Everyday for the past few days I've been going low.  Not at the same time as it would usually happen though. It might be at 10 in the morning, it might be at breakfast, after lunch, bedtime.  UGH.  So all my cleaning that so desperately needs my attention is stopped dead in its tracks.  I usually don't really care about having diabetes; I'm so used to having it that I hate it, but I don't let it get the best of me.  When it stops me from being able to do anything, I get kind of ticked off though.

Have I mentioned I've been looking into CGM's?  I was.  I decided against it because there seems to be more CON's than PRO's for me.  So, no thank you CGM, even though my insurance would pay for a great portion of it...  Want to know what I've been looking into though?  DAD's.  Diabetic Alert Dogs.  Pro's and Con's again though.  I NEED something to help me out though.  I need something that will give me a heads up before I go low, and before I get too high.  I can't keep living like this, I'll never make it.  I don't really know what to do...so I'm going to keep looking into things.  Right now, the DAD is looking like a pretty good option.  Keep reading to see where this takes me!

Bringing Up the Low's

I belong to this wonderful diabetes blog on facebook.  Its a blog for parents of diabetics, but I belonged to a different group on facebook and was asked to join the parents group.  I did thinking it was kind of silly, but boy am I ever glad I did join.  It is suck an amazing group, I feel really lucky to belong to it.

Anyways, this morning there was a posting from one of the moms who had given her daughter a glass of milk and her daughters blood sugars went through the roof.  Her sugars were normal, then they skyrocketed after the milk.  She was so confused as to why!  I thought, its MILK, that's  why she's high.  I wrote to her saying when my blood sugars go low that the BEST thing there is for me to bring my sugars up is milk.  It shoots me up while still being an easy to drink to try and get down when the yuckyness of the low sets in.  Its smooth, and really easy to gulp!  I was surprised when so many parents said they had never thought of using milk to bring up a low because its...well...milk.

I mentioned that she could try a test to see how the milk effects her blood sugars.  Give her a glass of milk when she hasn't ate or drank anything, then test her sugars every 3-4 minutes for a while after.  See how it brings her sugars up.  Some foods and drinks affect us different so milk might be one that really brings me up, but not so much other people.

Some of the other things I use to raise my sugars are apple juice, and if there is nothing else around I will  drink orange juice.  Glucose tabs don't do a thing to me!  NOTHING.  Straight sugar tabs, and they do nothing.  We were shopping at a grocery store a few months back and I felt weak.  My blood sugar was low 40's.  I ate 4 glucose tabs, checked about 6-8 minutes later....and I was the exact same number.  It hadn't budged an ounce.

OUCH!

So this is just a random post, but I wanted to put it on here anyways.

You know how your pickers (what I call the little machine that pokes my finger to draw blood) have different settings on it?  To make the level of poking weaker or stronger?  Well I accidentally changed mine and dang does it hurt!  I have 2 kits that I use.  One of the kits has an older picker in it and needs to be set to a 4 to draw blood.  The newer monitor has a new picker in it and it hurts like heck, so its set to a 2.  I must have changed the 2 to the 4 because MAN, did it hurt...and it still hurts...and I did it yesterday!  CRAZY.  I promise for some new fun posts soon...

A CGM?

I went to my Endocrinologist today.  He brought up the topic of a CGM (continuous glucose monitor).  I had secretly been looking into one on my own.  He said I would be a perfect candidate and asked me if I wanted him to go ahead and get minimed (a CGM company) involved to start research with my insurance company and get other papers started.  I'm pretty excited, I will keep ya'll posted!

Interesting Low

This weekend we went to Oklahoma for our Universities homecoming.  On Saturday night we were in Tulsa at our friends house, along with another couple.  Nick looked at me and said "check your sugar, your going low."  He always knows when I'm going low.  Anyways, I guess I was trying to give insulin before I checked my sugar which was bizarre (I don't remember this), so Nick went and got me some milk to drink while I tried to poke my finger.  I drank the milk, then got my blood glucose reading of 28.  Drink another glass of milk...  I had been feeling gross for a few hours and felt like I was coming down with something and the milk wasn't helping.  Suddenly I started to shake violently.  I kept going in and out of consciousness which is strange because I'm either conscious for my lows, or I'm not.  I was sitting up on the couch when he was giving me my milk telling him not to hold my head back.  He wasn't, but the shaking made me think he was pushing my head back.  I checked my sugars a few times while he was shoving food down my throat with milk.  Apricot jelly too, YUCK.  When I finally stopped shaking and started to calm down, Nick brought me a toast.  I ran to the bathroom and vomited.  The smell of the toast made me sick.  As soon as I was done vomiting, I felt so much better.  I left the bathroom and overhead our friends friend "M" on his phone.  His is a local firefighter and he was on the phone with his firehouse.  He asked them if they minding if he brought me up there for an IV of D50 (liquid glucose added into an IV).  They didn't mind so into the truck we go off to the firehouse.

On our way, police sirens go off.  All of a sudden we get pulled over for going 6 over the speed limit.  "M" tells the police officer who he is, that he is taking me (a diabetic) to his firehouse for a glucose IV.  The dumbass police officer starts lecturing him!  "Well, don't you think you should have called an ambulance?  Silly to be speeding..."  He finally lets us go (after asking M which house, address, location, and information to make sure we weren't lying) and M gets so upset.  I would have too!  He was annoyed that the officer was lecturing him.  Come on, it was free to go to the firehouse, the officer would have done the same thing!

When we got to the firehouse, sitting on the table were all the supplies needed for my IV.  I was sat into a chair and the firefighter who was doing the IV prepped my left arm.  He started the IV (owie, it hurt!) and unfortunately my vein wouldn't "flush".  They need to have the IV in the vein so that the glucose is administered directly into the vein so I  don't have things like my cellulitis hand last March happen.  He tried for a minute or two and then asked if he could try another vein.  I said yes, and he tried my right arm.  He got it right away.  Within seconds my blood sugar was rising.  YAY.  After about 30 minutes the IV was done and we checked my sugar: 212.  I then had to eat a spoonful of peanut butter before they would let me go.  It took about 30 minutes to eat it because as soon as I tasted it I felt sick again.  Finally I finished it and we went home.  I got back to our friends house and BLAH, was sick again.  UGH!  I managed to get a can of pears down and went straight to bed before I could get sick!

I am so thankful for great friends, and such kind hearted people.  I can't thank M enough for what he did.  We didn't get home until 1 in the morning and he was so nice about the entire episode.  He ruined his Saturday night to help take care of me.  I feel like a really lucky girl!  Thanks M!

Another low...

On my "diaversary" (anniversary of being diagnosed) a few weeks ago, I got a message on my facebook account.  It was from a Mommy of another diabetic.  She had seen my post in a parents of diabetics group we both belong too.  I know, I know, I'm not a parent of a diabetic, but the owner of the group asked me to join when she saw me on a different diabetes group.  Anyways, this group is amazing.  I have truly noticed myself taking better care of my diabetes since joining.  Even though I don't know any of these people personally, we all "know" each other and talk constantly.  Back to the message I got.  This Mommy, we will call her "A", sent a quick message introducing herself and telling me about her son "R" who is 3.  He was diagnosed a year ago (his diaversary is the day after mine!) so we were very similar in ages when we were diagnosed.  We hit it off INSTANTLY.  You know the saying "love at first sight?"  well, this was "friendship at first message."  Hah!  We talk quite often, have tons of things in common (other than diabetes).  Its nice to have that person you can just got to you know?  We love so many of the same things (hello designer purses), our clothing style in similar, we both have 2 sons, our husbands annoy us for the same reasons, and we both have great relationships with our husbands at the same time LOL.  We both go shopping when our hubbies go out on boys nights out.  We are both from Canada, have both lived in Europe, both are stay at home mommies too.  We love doing art with our kids, both wish we had a daughter, sigh...  Anyways, we really hit it off and its awesome!

Back to the main reason of this post Krista, come on...  Hah.  So the other day "A" put a picture on facebook about "R"'s blood sugar.  His was 34.  Eek.  The next day, I was 35.  Twinkies!  I thought about letting it go one unit lower so we would have been the same, but that was the diabetes thinking.  I quickly had some milk and was pretty well back to normal!  Oh the joys of diabetes...

Insulin Change

Yesterday my endocrinologists nurse, Maggie, called me back.  I had called because of these silly low's I've been having for almost 2 months straight.  Every...Single...Day.  My endo changed my morning insulin from 13 units of humulin down to 6.  Guess what?  I STILL WENT LOW.  Not low, low, but low.  Same time, 10:30 in the morning, and I was 60.  What the heck?  But, my breakfast readings have been lower than they were so that might be affecting it too.  I'll let you guys know whats happening in the next few days, hopefully these changes work.

So Sleepy

We are now going on three weeks on daily low (or lower) blood-sugars.  I have been as low as "lo" on my blood glucose meter to high 50's.  You would think the extreme lo's would be hard to recover from, but you wouldn't think "barely low" would be hard to get over.  After you go lo it is exhausting.  You get so sleepy.  Your energy is gone.  It's like you are going on 40 hours of no sleep.  And then...I remember I've got two little boys who need my attention.  I don't have "time" to recover.  I don't have time to make "me" better.  Nobody else with help these boys.  And that my friends, makes it even more exhausting.

Happy Diabetic Birthday to Me

Happy Diabetic Birthday to Me,
Happy Diabetic Birthday to Me,
Happy Diabetic Birthday,
Happy Diabetic Birthday,
Happy Diabetic Birthday to Me (and Happy real birthday to my Nanny).

I was diagnosed with this shitty disease 26 years ago today.  It pisses me off to even think about how long that is.  I have an enormous amount of anger towards this disease, but I'm saddened by the fact that I try and ignore it to the point that I am so far behind of some of the advances that have happened with this disease in the last few years.  People talk about all these new gadgets and it blows my mind!  I have had it by far longer than anyone else I have ever even heard of, but I'm still stuck in the dinosaur ages with how I live with it.  Don't get my wrong, I've tried many things and hated just about every single one of them...(like the pump, ugh), but then there is now a glucose meter that plugs into you!  HELLO, I need one!

No need to sit here and write depressed all day Krista, you've got munchkins to take care of!

(Ding Dong)  Doorbell...  Look what the hubby sent because he knew today was going to be hard for me!  I sure do love him!

My Biggest Fear

My biggest fear with living with diabetes isn't what most people would guess: "I might die from this disease."  I'm not stupid, I KNOW I will die from this disease.  What scares the hell out of me is knowing that a disease could potentially be found and I will be too old to get it.  Or I will have had diabetes for too long to get the cure.  Its not like once a cure is found, BOOM, everyone will be cured within a few days.  No, it will take years and years of being on a waiting list.  Then, who gets to go first?  The newly diagnosed?  The youngest?  It certainly won't be me, the girl who has had it her whole life.  Why save her?  She's bound to have things start to go wrong soon anyways, no point wasting a good cure for someone who has been sick so long.  That my friends, is what scares me.  I am past the curing point.  I'm no longer a curable candidate.

Getting "Used" to My Insulin Dosages

Last week was the dreaded week that I have every few months.  My Endocrinologist is amazing and we really get along great.  I don't want anyone to think that perhaps he is the issue.  I have had a few people say "why not get a second opinion?"  I don't need a second opinion because there isn't really anything anyone can do!  Anyways, here's the problem:

Everytime I go to my endo to get checked and to adjust my sugars, my body has a heck of a time adjusting to new insulin dosages.  My body eventually gets used to it (the insulin amounts).  Once it does, my blood sugar levels will drop and I go really low.  The insulin then won't work well.  So, in the beginning I go low getting used to the change (even if its only one of two units), then I go high because its as if it doesn't work anymore (this time frame is about 2 months of my body being forced to accept a new level of insulin), and then BOOM a full week of super low's around the same time every day (as if my body finally figures out "oh ya, this stuff is supposed to lower sugars, not make them higher).  BUT, this issue of lows only lasts about a week.  So bizarre.  Let's talk about last week, shall we?

Sunday:  About 10:45 I felt like garbage, and I knew I was low.  I had a glass of milk and felt better.  Yes I should have tested my sugar, but I didn't.  Bad me, I know.

Monday:  I can't focus my vision right.  Its blurry.  This means: I'm low.  Nick (my awesome husband) gets me some milk (which is the number one thing to bring up my sugars).  It works.  I also have some cheese.  Its 10:15, so I bring the kids to our gym because they have toddler time in the gym.  I have them play for about 45 minutes but I  feel so awful.  I drink my "always in my purse" bottle of apple juice.  Feeling better I drive the 1 mile home and re-check my sugars.  48.  I have another glass of milk.  Nick says my pupils are small so he gives me a cheese stick  to go along with my milk.  He has to finish a conference call meeting in the office so he goes back into his office.  He come's out 5, yes 5, minutes later to check on me: COMATOSE.  I'm beyond help.  He tries to give me honey (which I hate because i only have ever had it when I'm low so it makes me sick.  I vomit, like usual.  He checks my blood and I'm still in the 40's but I have now vomited all of my milk, honey, and cheese (did I mention I never fully finished the cheese?  He said it was hanging out of my mouth when he found me).  So he calls 911.  I get very combatative and I fight him when I go low.  BUT I seem to do okay with paramedics.  When they got there I was in the 30's and I don't remember them there at all.  I don't remember ANY of this.  My first memory of this whole ordeal is when I am in the ambulance with them.  I told the paramedic I was nauseous and he gives me a shot of anti-nausea medicine into my arm IV.   To make a long story shorter...I don't remember much of the day at the hospital.  Nick and the boys showed up and tried to sit with me but its hard to keep a 12 month old and a 3 1/2 year old under control in a small hospital room.  The nurse had given me some pain meds too so I was sleeping and out of it. I tried to nibble on the same set of crackers for a full hour.  I cannot explain how extremely difficult it is to eat food when you are low.  Imagine going to a buffet.  Eat as many plates as you can.  Are you stuffed?  Now, eat one more FULL plate.  Plus a big drink to go along with it.  Oh, don't forget the slice of cake too.  Now, are you full?  Really full?  Wanting to vomit full?  Have a few more bites.  Oh wait...now your a diabetic hearing "you can't go home until you eat."  What?  I am nauseated and beyond full.  I CAN"T eat.  But you have too.  Suck it up and just eat.  "It can't be that hard, just eat and we can go home."  That is my least favorite sentence in the entire world.  Anyways,  Nick had to leave with the kids but came back a few hours later.  They let me go home at 4:00 because I could finally eat (not much but I think the nurse eventually figured it was almost a hopeless battle).  I hate it when this happens.  I do what I'm supposed to but this damn disease overpowers me and it wins again.

Tuesday: Checking my sugars to make sure I'm not low, and boom: SHAKY.  Ugh, I need juice or milk, ASAP.  I'm 34, and annoyed.  But it only takes a few minutes to get back  to normal

Wednesday:  Around 10:00 am I check to make sure I'm not going low like the previous three days.  Guess what my meter says?  "lo."  It won't even read a number!  What the hell!  I feel fine!  "NIIIIIIIIIICK."  He runs and grabs me milk and cheese.  I am feeling fine!  Not low at all!  He sits with me while I check my sugars over and over until I'm back into the 60's...then into the 80's.  So so so weird.

This goes on until Thursday until BOOM, I'm high with a case of the back to normal blood sugars.  I don't get it and neither does Dr. E.